Returning to work has been a long process. A difficult choice, and even harder to “justify”. Although I know I don’t need to.
I think there comes a point in life where you need to “check-in” with what is going. Not only in yours but in your children’s too. As parents, it is our task to make sure we are giving our kids the best of everything we possibly can. The best of our time, our energy, our knowledge and ourselves. When you feel like you aren’t giving the best any more, its time to shake things up a little.
As previously discussed in my blog, after the birth of our second child, the return to paid employment wasn’t feasible for a number of reasons. The travel to and from work was meaning I was leaving the house really early. Ruby was having to start her day really early too. The childcare costs of both children needing wrap around care and full time nursery meant that my work salary was wiped out. So financially we would be no better off. The fact that Fred is my last baby, meant that I had first hand experience on how quickly they grow. I wanted to hold on to that for as long as possible.
The End Of The Road
I am however, realising, that as Fred approached 2, I am fast running out of interesting ways to teach him new things, he only spends time with me during the week. (apart from a toddler group one morning a week). and he is desperate for other interaction. He loves being busy, being outdoors and charging around. I can give him as much of that as possible between the school run, and running the house, but still this does not change the interaction he only gets with me.
We toyed with the idea of trying out nursery. Ruby started nursery when she was 9 months old and absolutely thrived from it, she learnt so much, had so many new experiences, and made lots of little friends. Spending time with Ruby was also more appreciated. For two days a week, she was at nursery all day, and by the time we were home from work and had our evening meal it was time for bed.
This then throws me into another quandary. If I know that realistically Fred is going to love nursery and be out of the house a few days a week, then, what am I going to do? Without a little arm being wrapped around my leg all day means I could have the housework completed by lunch, and then what? I don’t think I could sit at home and tick the hours away waiting for the school run or to pick Fred back up again. I need to go back to work, I need to be busy too.
Originally the plan was for me to return to work when Fred turned 5. I would then try and find a job that would fit around the school run and the rest of family life. However, realising that Fred would benefit from socialising with other children and adults has made the decision to place him into nursery a little easier.
I remember Ruby coming home one time with her book filled in. It said how they had looked at mini beasts. They counted legs, looked at wings, and painted pictures of their own mini beasts. In all honesty, never would I be the one to be out in the garden searching out creatures it’s never something that has crossed my mind to do, nor do I have any interest, and that is how wonderful nursery is. Children are taught the things we were and have long forgotten, and widen their experiences.
If you are in the same position and thinking of returning to work, try indeed. You can even search for part-time or term-time only positions!
I am not entirely sure how I will cope heading back into the big wide world of work again. But I am excited for the next chapter in our life. I am happy to admit I can’t give my child everything. I also want him to have the opportunity to have everything. If that means I have to give him up a little then this mum is ok with that.
My little man, my special boy. Every decision I make is with you and your big sister in mind ALWAYS. I hope you will love nursery and adapt to the change of being a bit more independent quickly. Just know I am forever here for you and your biggest cheerleader.